The musings of a wanderer......

Goodbyes

One would think that if there is anything I would be an expert in at this point in my life it should be saying goodbyes and packing. And yet I’m total shit at both. I spend my 20’s bouncing between the states of North Carolina, Connecticut, Pennsylvania, Arizona, California and Washington. My car loaded to the brim as I would drive cross country to whichever city held my next adventure. Many of these states I yo-yo’d in between, setting up a life in San Francisco and San Diego a couple times, and in Seattle several more times. Since I first left Canada in 2002 I’ve moved at least 26 times. I’m saying at least because my memory isn’t super sharp, and I’m sure there’s one or two moves I may have forgotten. So much packing and unpacking. This is of course spread between Canada, the U.S. and Saudi Arabia. Each assignment brought with it a new set of friends and a new set of adventures. And a new set of goodbyes.

The expat world is similarly as transient as the world of travel nursing. People come into your life and you form intense bonds over a short period of time and then either you leave, or they leave, or both. It’s the nature of the life style, because especially in Saudi, no one stays forever. Some goodbyes are easy because the world is sprinkled with assholes. Some are gut wrenchingly hard. Sometimes these goodbyes take a long time to get over. The void that’s left takes a while to fill. It’s a blessing and a curse. To allow people to deeply touch you in ways you don’t initially realize, and then have to part ways with them. That the world can feel both so small and enormous at the same time. But such is life. And if I’ve learned one thing it’s that love is infinite. It goes beyond goodbyes. It lives in the spaces in between those goodbyes.

So here’s to those of you who have deeply touched my life. I do so hope that our paths cross again. See you someplace down the road……

“The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be.

Maybe we’ve lived a thousand lives before this one and in each if them we’ve found each other.

And maybe each time, we’ve been forced apart by the same reasons.

That means that this goodbye is both a goodbye for the past ten thousand years

and a prelude for what will come”

From the book The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks.

 

 

8 Comments

  1. Jerry Everard

    Wow – what a wonderful post – and yes goodbyes can be very difficult. Some people enter our lives for the duration, and some, as you say, are there just for a time and then we leave or they do. And some friends we see for a while, then not for 20 years and yet it is like picking up a conversation we had left off a few minutes ago.

    Sometimes I think the strength of a friendship is built on the spaces between, as much as the time we spend together. Perhaps it’s time that people stopped saying goodbye, as it sounds kind of final, but maybe the Australian ‘see you later’ works better as it leaves open the possibility of future reunions 🙂

    Cheers – Jerry

    • kristinewanders

      Jerry- I’m loving your blog as well! Yes I by far prefer “see you later” as opposed to “goodbye!”

  2. Mom

    Yes the heart is a resilient instrument. And unfortunately I’ve had to say goodbye to you more than those 26 times. Fortunately the welcome backs are worth the pain. Our souls are definitely connected. Big love.

    • kristinewanders

      Yes it is resilient and over time it does manage to heal itself. Love you loads!!

  3. Ale

    Loved this entry.

    • kristinewanders

      Thank you so much!

  4. Christina

    Yesssss girl! This is actually what I wrote my first blog post about, the hard goodbyes while traveling. You sound so much like me in the way that I can’t sit still in one city. I’m always bouncing around too 🙂 I hope our paths cross one day out in the real world <3

    • kristinewanders

      Me too. Luckily for those of us that travel often the chances of landing in the same place increase. I met up this week in Dubrovnik with a fellow travel blogger I’ve known online for a while and finally had the chance to meet in person!

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